Lake FREAKIN Erie read funny description

A storm over Lake Freakin Erie



Lake Erie (noun) One of the five great lakes located on the border of the United States and Canada.
LOCATION = Lake is stands as the largest nuisance border for the state of Ohio. This large sociopathic body of unfresh water is 210 feet at its deepest point, the part where its long lost victims lie, never to be found.
Lake Erie's largest shoreline runs along the United States. Its Northern border burdens the country of Canada with its foul presence of dead fish and stench.
Its southern border consists of the unfortunate states of Ohio, Pennsylvania and New York, on which its dumps it wrath of snow and tornadoes.

DISCOVERY OF : Frenchman Louis Jolliet was the first European to discover this worthless piece of crap .as he waved a white flag in a totally French manner to surrender to it ,and went home and killed himself after wards , knowing what a piece of crap discovery he had made.
The French and British went to war over Lake Erie but when they actually saw what a piece of crap it was, they gave it to America and Canada .
America and Canada now share the stinky lake as though anyone would want it, they took it out of pity for the lake.
World famous attraction Cedar Point is on the shoreline, but upon arrival visitors from other places are so appalled by the Lakes appearance that the turn around and driver out of Ohio as fast as possible. The visitors are often found to be in need of years of therapy afterwards.

WILDLIFE :Lake Erie is home to the Endangered Lake Erie Water Snake these snakes are often seen on the beaches trying to die from the shame of living in Lake Erie. Toxic algae is a problem in Lake EERIE , Lake Erie Water snakes are often found munching down the algae in an attempt to end their miserable lives.
********* The state of Ohio pays millions of dollars a year t put microchips in the snakes anuses to keep track of their dying population. (the snake anus thing is TRUE) [link]


Personality :Lake Erie - Also known as the inconsiderate body of water the dumps snow and rain on northern OHIO! Lake Erie is a well known sociopath who feels no remorse for offences committed.

- A large inconsiderate body of water whose soul purpose in LIFE is to upset the human race.

Hobbies:
-Trolling Buffalo New York- with large amounts of snow
- Sinking ships.
-Pissing off the British.
-Causing countries to fight over borders.
- Almost causing Michigan and Ohio to go to war. (look it up its called the Toledo War)
- Harassing Northeast Ohio with its droppings
- Drowning people.
- Ruining Holidays.
-Eroding the Lake shore,
- eating homes!!
- Luring curious people to their deaths
- ***pissing off the U.S. Army Core of Engineers (the lake always wins in the end) Knocks over every god damn thing they build!
- Stinking up a fun summer day
-freezing lighthouses
-knocking over break-walls
- giving off freezing winds
-burning out our damn eyes on bright summer days!
-leaving Sandbars in inconvenient places cause sing freighters to get stuck in the middle of the lake
-being an overall jerk to humanity in general
-getting easily stirred up during a storm and sinking ships for LOLZ
- covering lighthouses in ice, therefore the lights do not function and ships hit the shoreline. Killing a bunch of sea men.
- Raining on the 4th of July JUST FOR LOLZ

THATS RIGHT IT SINKS SHIPS FOR LOLZ
-secretly plotting you demise at this very moment, come over here

Lake Freakin Erie - belongs to The State of Ohio- because we are inconsiderate ass holes that do not like to share anything! (just kidding) You can have our filthy lake.

Lake Erie needs some prozac it has serious issues.

FUN FACT: the other Great Lakes laugh at Lake Erie !
- Lake Erie does not give a --- what you think.